If you live in St. Louis, you'll understand this...
Posted: Thu Oct 08, 2009 12:33 pm
If you live in St. Louis, you'll understand this.
If you've ever visited St. Louis you'll understand this.
If you've never been to St. Louis, this is your first and ONLY warning
Visitor's guide To Driving in St. Louis
The morning rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:00 AM.
The evening rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:00 PM.. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.
Gravois Road can only be pronounced by a native.
Ditto for Spoede and Chouteau.
Construction on Highways 40, 64, 70, 255, 270, 44, 55 and I-170 is
a way of life, and a permanent form of entertainment.
The Page Avenue extension and Airport expansion projects
took over
20 years to get approved and St. Louisan's lost track of
how many political
figures claimed them as their own ideas.
A St. Louisan from South County has never been to North
County and
visa versa.
West County has everything delivered.
St. Louisan's were aghast when the federal government
required them
to redo the highway signs to indicate that the federal
highway went to
cities in other states instead of local municipalities.
If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is
probably a
factory defect, or has been on for the last 17 miles
There are 2 exits on Highway 40 for Clayton Road and on
I-44, 2
exits for Big Bend.
All old ladies with blue hair in Cadillacs (driving on
Olive west
of 270) have the right of way.
Laclede Station Road mysteriously changes names as you
cross
intersections..
As do McCausland, Lindbergh, Watson, Reavis Barracks,
Fee Fee,
McKnight, Airport Road, Midland, Olive and Clarkson.
Drivers are starting to cut their OWN plates rather than
go through
the MO. Vehicle Dept. to get new tags. You can purchase
tags from dealers
behind QuiK Shops in the city. They are cheaper, the
clerks are nicer,and
the service is faster.
You can go all four directions on Highway 270:
North and South in West County, East and West in South
County, and
East and West in North County.
Confused? So are the St. Louis drivers.
There are 54 school districts on the Missouri side alone
-- each of
which has their own school bus system and scheduled
times to block
traffic.
There are 75 "official neighborhoods" in the City of St.
Louis. St.
Louisans commonly give directions (especially for
restaurants) to
strangers based on these neighborhoods which aren't
marked on any
maps that are handed out by the tourist board, the AAA
or Map quest.
There are 91 official municipalities in St. Louis
County. Each
Municipality has it's own rules, regulations, and often
their own police
departments.
More importantly, most have their own snow removal
contracts so
it's not uncommon to drive down a road in winter and
have one block plowed,
the next salted, the next piled with snow and the last
partially cleared by
residents wanting to get out of their driveways
No native St. Louisan knows that Lindbergh runs from
South County
to North County! And, if you tell them, they will not
believe you. Lindbergh
belongs to every neighborhood except Kirkwood, who had
the nerve to
creatively change the name to "Kirkwood Road".
Any car parked longer than 4 hours in the city, is
considered a
parts store.
Highway 270 is our daily version of the NASCAR circuit.
YIELD signs are for decoration only. No native St.
Louisan will
ever grasp the concept.
Lambert Field and St. Louis International Airport really
are the
same place. The East Terminal, however, is a different
place
Never ever try to cross a bridge in St. Louis during
rush hour
unless you have a port-a-potty in the car.
The outer belt is Highway 270 which turns into Highway
255 in South
County.
The inner belt is Highway 170 and if it's a 3XX number
it's an
outer outer belt.
Highway 40 is the same as Interstate 64 through the
middle of St.
Louis.
If you need directions to O'Fallon, make sure to specify
Illinois
or Missouri.
The City of Balldwin actually proposed that drivers use
connecting
strip mall parking lots to get from place to place
rather than drive on
Manchester Road to cut the traffic on Manchester.
If it snows or rains? Stay home!!
If you've ever visited St. Louis you'll understand this.
If you've never been to St. Louis, this is your first and ONLY warning
Visitor's guide To Driving in St. Louis
The morning rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:00 AM.
The evening rush hour is from 3:00 to 7:00 PM.. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday morning.
Gravois Road can only be pronounced by a native.
Ditto for Spoede and Chouteau.
Construction on Highways 40, 64, 70, 255, 270, 44, 55 and I-170 is
a way of life, and a permanent form of entertainment.
The Page Avenue extension and Airport expansion projects
took over
20 years to get approved and St. Louisan's lost track of
how many political
figures claimed them as their own ideas.
A St. Louisan from South County has never been to North
County and
visa versa.
West County has everything delivered.
St. Louisan's were aghast when the federal government
required them
to redo the highway signs to indicate that the federal
highway went to
cities in other states instead of local municipalities.
If someone actually has their turn signal on, it is
probably a
factory defect, or has been on for the last 17 miles
There are 2 exits on Highway 40 for Clayton Road and on
I-44, 2
exits for Big Bend.
All old ladies with blue hair in Cadillacs (driving on
Olive west
of 270) have the right of way.
Laclede Station Road mysteriously changes names as you
cross
intersections..
As do McCausland, Lindbergh, Watson, Reavis Barracks,
Fee Fee,
McKnight, Airport Road, Midland, Olive and Clarkson.
Drivers are starting to cut their OWN plates rather than
go through
the MO. Vehicle Dept. to get new tags. You can purchase
tags from dealers
behind QuiK Shops in the city. They are cheaper, the
clerks are nicer,and
the service is faster.
You can go all four directions on Highway 270:
North and South in West County, East and West in South
County, and
East and West in North County.
Confused? So are the St. Louis drivers.
There are 54 school districts on the Missouri side alone
-- each of
which has their own school bus system and scheduled
times to block
traffic.
There are 75 "official neighborhoods" in the City of St.
Louis. St.
Louisans commonly give directions (especially for
restaurants) to
strangers based on these neighborhoods which aren't
marked on any
maps that are handed out by the tourist board, the AAA
or Map quest.
There are 91 official municipalities in St. Louis
County. Each
Municipality has it's own rules, regulations, and often
their own police
departments.
More importantly, most have their own snow removal
contracts so
it's not uncommon to drive down a road in winter and
have one block plowed,
the next salted, the next piled with snow and the last
partially cleared by
residents wanting to get out of their driveways
No native St. Louisan knows that Lindbergh runs from
South County
to North County! And, if you tell them, they will not
believe you. Lindbergh
belongs to every neighborhood except Kirkwood, who had
the nerve to
creatively change the name to "Kirkwood Road".
Any car parked longer than 4 hours in the city, is
considered a
parts store.
Highway 270 is our daily version of the NASCAR circuit.
YIELD signs are for decoration only. No native St.
Louisan will
ever grasp the concept.
Lambert Field and St. Louis International Airport really
are the
same place. The East Terminal, however, is a different
place
Never ever try to cross a bridge in St. Louis during
rush hour
unless you have a port-a-potty in the car.
The outer belt is Highway 270 which turns into Highway
255 in South
County.
The inner belt is Highway 170 and if it's a 3XX number
it's an
outer outer belt.
Highway 40 is the same as Interstate 64 through the
middle of St.
Louis.
If you need directions to O'Fallon, make sure to specify
Illinois
or Missouri.
The City of Balldwin actually proposed that drivers use
connecting
strip mall parking lots to get from place to place
rather than drive on
Manchester Road to cut the traffic on Manchester.
If it snows or rains? Stay home!!
